I love Christmas. LOVE Christmas. And now it's over. Booooo! But as long as I can share my presents with you, I'll be fine. This year was particularly exciting, as I had made a mini-Christmas list around Thanksgiving, and then completely forgot about it. So when I was opening presents, namely, very specific things I had asked for; I was ridiculously excited.

 "OH MY GOD - I FORGOT ALL ABOUT THIS BOOK!"

(From Booklist: For their wit, intelligence, good looks, and politics, the aristocratic Mitford sisters were the toast of the mid-twentieth century. They were prodigious correspondents, particularly between each other. Mosley, daughter-in-law of Diana Mitford, has selected and excerpted from some 12,000 letters between the sisters over a period of almost 80 years, to shed light on women described as Famous Notorious Talented Glamourous Turbulent Unpredicable Celebrated Infamous Rebellious Colourful & Idiosyncratic, as quoted from Jessica's obituaries.

Ed. note: They totally would have been Golightly Girls.)

And

"OH, THAT'S RIGHT! FROM THE WEDDING!"

(A great shot of my sisters and me, on my adorable sister, Ellie's, wedding day. Ellie framed the photo and gave it as a gift. Very challenging to get a shot where everyone looks good AND relaxed. Sister Jessie's first comment was 'Why am I standing off to the side?')

 And

"OOOOH! SHOE SHOPPING, COMING RIGHT UP!"

 (Sister Jessie knows I'd rather shop for my own shoes.)

 And

"AWESOME! I TOTALLY FORGOT ABOUT THIS TOO!"

 (My mom rocks. My dad also rocks, as he just wrote a nice, fat check, which will most likely magically turn into shoes.)

So I think my brief brush with Alzheimer's made for the most exciting Christmas yet. Both for me, and my entire family. Did you get anything good for Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwaanza/Tet/Festivus? Share it with us! (Just vicarious sharing. You don't have to let us HAVE it. Unless you really want to.)

Season 8's "The Bachelor" (ABC) Travis Stork (MD) is back. 

And, thanks to my mom, he is now on my radar again. 

"Oh honey, Dr. Phil had Travis-the-Bachelor on today, and he has written a book".

"Unh hunh."

"The book is called 'Don't Be That Girl', and it talks about reasons women are still single, and what they're doing to sabotage potential relationships".

"Unh hunh.  So, is Travis in a relationship?"

"Oh. No, he's still single."

"Ahhhh.  I see."

I will not openly mock the book, as I haven't read it yet.  And I will probably read it - it has a fun pink cover, with a Hot-Mess-of-a-girl (wearing a violently unflattering ensemble - is that a nightie?  is that purse made out of Barney the Dinosaur?), with clearly diagrammed issues:

And, as I notice there is a female co-author, I think the book might actually have some merit.  No offense meant to Dr. Stork (I really can't say that with a straight face - I know he's an ER doctor, but OBGYN is just screaming for him).

I want the book to be entertaining.  I do. 

I am hoping this will become the righteous successor of one of my favorite books of all time, "He's Just Not That Into You".

Kids.  You've heard of this book.  But if you haven't read it, you are missing some good fun.  I think EVERYONE should read it.  Even if you're nowhere near a relationship.  Even if you have been married for aeons.  Even if you are a guy.  It is just hilarious.  It also has the added benefit of having been written by Greg Behrendt, who was/is a stand-up comedian, and is FUNNY.

Bachelor Travis?  I dunno.  He's pretty, but let's see if this...

WAIT FOR IT...

Stork

can

deliver.

Once I stop laughing at how truly awful that was, I will solemnly promise not to do puns anymore.  Somtimes.

"Romancing the Stone" is one of my favorite movies.  Of All Time.  It is a movie that I own, and a movie that I can watch, at least once a week, until I'm dead.  The movie introduced me Cartagena, Columbia, mudslides, chained crocodiles and Danny de Vito driving a tiny car through tall fields of something, while smoking a cigar.

It also introduced me to Kathleen Turner, who I greatly admired for her ease with a machete, no-nonsense approach to treasure hunting, and ability to throw back some tequila.  I have seen most of her movies, favoring "The Man With Two Brains", and "Body Heat".

Kathleen has recently written, what sounds to be a fantastic "tell all" about her life, and doesn't hold back on the good stuff.

"Send Yourself Roses" dishes about Kathleen's "life, love and leading roles":

I love any book that has the potential to make a significant portion of Hollywood wince in anticipation.

William Hurt (co-star in Body Heat) -

"Working with Bill Hurt was - shall we say - enlightening. In those days, he was pretty wild. He drank a great deal and took a lot of recreational drugs - he loved those magic mushrooms. He loved women, too; I don't know how many he went through during filming."

Michael Douglas (Romancing the Stone, Jewel of the Nile, War of the Roses) -

"I hadn't known Michael (who was then estranged from his first wife, Diandra) before we started filming, but we bonded from the start and I soon found myself falling in love with him.

Being with him certainly helped me to portray my character's growing sexual awareness, though the romance ended when his wife decided she wanted him back."

Nicolas Cage (Peggy Sue Got Married)-

"...everything Francis (Ford Coppola) wanted him to do, he went against - to show that he wasn't under his uncle's wing. Which was ridiculous. Oh, that stupid voice of his and the fake teeth! Honestly, I cringe to think about it."

Burt Reynolds (Switching Channels)-

For whatever reason, the first thing Burt said to me was: 'I've never taken second billing to a woman.'"

Ugh.  Gross. 

Ms. Turner just tells it like it was, which takes...can I say "balls"?  Something she may have picked up from playing Chandler's drag-queen father on "Friends".

The book will be available on February 7.  Just in time for Valentine's Day!  Buy yourself "Send Yourself Roses".  Does that sound redundant?