Okay, we here at Holiday Golightly are very much "Girl's Girls".  And this is very much a "Girl's Forum", where we want to support and champion and defend our Girls when necessary.

The issue at hand:  Maxim magazine voted Sarah Jessica Parker the "Unsexiest Woman Alive" .

The November 2007 issue of Maxim magazine offered it's readers some food for thought with their "Unsexiest Women Alive" feature.  And I use the word "food" in the same way I would describe aerosol cheese in a can as "food". 

For some reason, the list's controversy has resurfaced this month. A friend pointed out, it may have something to do with the fact that the Sex & The City movie release is nearing (MAY 30TH - MARK YOUR CALENDARS), and PR people may have dredged up the issue for more publicity. I would be thrilled if SATC could glean something positive out of the unnecessary roughness.

When I heard that Maxim had a feature devoted to who they thought the Unsexiest Women were, I rolled my eyes. I mean really.  I imagined the list was probably written in crayon, in someone's backyard treehouse.  Is everyone at Maxim 11?

Whether or not you find SJP, or the other nominees, sexy - creating an entire magazine feature around it is in such poor taste.

It might also be in poor taste to re-print part of the list, but I'm trying to make a point.  Work with me here.

These were the "bottom five":

5. Britney Spears - Well, okay. But only okay, because at some point I'm sure she was ironically on their "Hottest" list, and maybe they're making a case for the "Just Say No" thing.  Just say no to drugs, or to Kevin Federline, or to Cheetos as a breakfast food.  We hear she is on the road to recovery, though, and we're pulling for her.

4. Madonna - Oh come on. Jimmy Kimmel just admitted (in Elle magazine) that Madonna was his first adolescent crush, and also admitted what goes hand-in-hand with an adolescent boy's crush.  Maybe "hand-in-hand" isn't the correct phrase... Who is Maxim kidding?

3. Sandra Oh- I don't think they know who she is. Or they're frightened of her bossy, no B.S. character on "Grey's Anatomy". TV isn't real, boys. She probably wouldn't stomp your delicates in real life. Probably.

2. Amy Winehouse- see #5 - being all smacked out is definitely unsexy.

1. Sarah Jessica Parker- and we're back to the discussion...

This is one of several photos of Ms. Parker, courtesy of W Magazine, taken 6 months after giving birth to her son.  I very badly want to be unsexy like this.

I also discovered that Maxim created a list of "TV's Least Appealing Ladies", which starts off with CNN's venerable Christiane Amanpour at #10.  My contacts can no longer be located, as the furious eye-rolling has flung them far across the room.

So, with these lists Maxim has proven itself to be both unsexy and unappealing, as well as just plain irrelevant.  Unless you're 11.

(Ed note:  no offense meant to 11 year-olds). 

I am not sure what to think of this.  A controversy has erupted around the cover of Vogue's April 2008 issue, which features NBA all-star LeBron James, and ridiculously lithe supermodel, Gisele Bundchen.

I wasn't sure which headline was supposed to relate to the cover, at first glance...

"You are (not) what you eat"?  With his open mouth, it does look like LeBron is possibly ready to eat Gisele, although she is realistically the more hungry of the two...

Or

"Perfect Fit:  Dressing For Every Shape..."?  As in: If you are a buff athelete, you should not try to wear a silky gown, and if you are a model, don't wear boring black shorts and tank...

The April 2008 cover of Vogue looks like this:

Is your first thought "King Kong"?  Mine wasn't either.  Mine was "Gisele looks like an overly eager basketball groupie, who ran out onto the court to get a photo with LeBron, who was in the middle of a full-court press".

An Art History professor at Marymount Manhattan College disagreed with me:

“Here you have an image of a black male athlete in an exceptionally aggressive stance, wide footed, bending over, clutching her with his arm,” said Jason Rosenfeld... “It’s one thing to have an athlete in that kind of pose and with that kind of expression on a court after he or she has done something miraculous. It’s another thing to couple it with someone who is of an entirely different ilk and gender. That turns it into a racially charged image.”

Hmmmm.  I don't know, but let's see what the accompanying story is. 

"Shape Issue:  ...World's Top Models & Star Athletes".  This is what worries me the most.  Now, I haven't yet looked at the issue (it should be in my mailbox today), but generally speaking, models are not the MODELS of health (oh - clutching stomach - hilarious pun!), and their "best bodies" are the result of starvation diets, laxatives or controlled substance abuse.  Don't freak out, I said "generally speaking".  I'm sure there are a few who exercise and eat right.

The interpretation of any photo is in the eye of the beholder.  Vogue had this to say, in response to Jason Rosenfeld's claims:

“It’s so exhausting that every time people see an image of a black person they work themselves into a tizzy that somehow it doesn’t adhere to the way in which they think a black person should be presented,”...

“Needless to say, the intention from the beginning was only to depict LeBron and Gisele as superstars at the top of their game,” Vogue spokesperson Patrick O’Connell said. “The point about the entire issue is that it celebrates diversity. And I think that people need to look at the entire issue.”

Vogue is typically cutting edge, and I think they could have really stepped the whole "celebrating diversity" thing up a bit, by having LeBron and Gisele wearing the same dress. 

Channing Tatum is one of our borderline-jailbait crushes, and his new movie "Stop Loss" opens this weekend.  We should probably feel a little dirtier than we do, about our lust for him, but if you've seen the movie "Step Up", you'll totally agree with us.

If you haven't seen it, put it in your Netflix queue.  He dances, takes his shirt off, and delivers many delicious brooding stares.  Is there a plot?  Erm...probably?

Is that important?

HAPPY FRIDAY FROM THE GOLIGHTLY GIRLS! 

Are you saying "Gerard who?"  Shame on you!  The moment you caught a first glimpse of the movie trailer, or posters, for the testosterone-soaked "300", with all the shiny, rippling abs, you should have immediately scrambled to your computers and Googled away, to discover the sheer manliness that is Gerard Butler.

Photo: movieblog.ugo.com 

Sexy and Scottish, and that's really all you need to know.  He's currently sharing some screen time with Jodie Foster in the kids' movie "Nim's Island", which we probably won't see.  Unless we hear that Gerard takes his shirt off.  Like in this photo:

Photo:  Peibols on flickr.com 

Oh, you poor dear, you're soaking wet!  Here, I have a towel for you to wrap yourself up in.  Towel, terrycloth dress that I'm wearing, whatever. 

HAPPY FRIDAY & HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND, FROM THE GOLIGHTLY GIRLS! 

This is going to feel a little "Mean Girls" (which we loved, by the way), but when you get a closer look at the photo, you'll understand.

Photo: National Photo Group

Where to start? So, you're going to the airport...and... Um....well, the bags are good. Both look functional, and the larger one would be the first place I would tuck that headband, those shoes, those leggings and that t-shirt. Out of sight. Zipped up inside the bag.

I would then take the bag to an airport locker, lock it up and throw the key into the closest body of water.

This entire look hurts my eyes, and I am not lucky enough to be sporting dark sunglasses to lessen the pain. Lindsay Lohan is such a beautiful girl, and while her hair appears clean, and it looks like she has a fresh manicure, the clothes relegate her to the hippie-hip-hop-bag-lady category.

She may be all alone in that category, which would be just fine.

Possible pro: the shoelaces have been loosened, to facilitate swiftness in the security line. Other than that, no further thought has been given to this airport ensemble.

Grade:

F

I know everyone calls him "McDreamy",but I will always think of him as Ronald Miller, the kid who mows lawns, from "Can't Buy Me Love".  This is my own issue, as I used to watch "Can't Buy Me Love" nearly every weekend in college.

But I totally appreciate that Ronnie has grown up, and grown into a very attractive guy, whose new movie "Made of Honor" opens today, and who really seems terribly unaffected by his fame.

Photo:  Televisionista.blogspot 

So unaffected that he is able to nap peacefully while being photographed shirtless.  And in black and white.

Photo: greysanatomyinsider.com

HAPPY FRIDAY & HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND FROM THE GOLIGHTLY GIRLS! 

That's right, Harry Goldenblatt. We are all about the "Sex & The City" movie this month, and are devoting the remaining May Friday Men features to the men of "Sex & The City".

"Harry was the total opposite of what Charlotte desired from her men. He was bald and chewed with his mouth open. Charlotte knew that she could let her guard down around Harry, since she would never fall for anybody like him. That is, until she did."

Photo: carriesdiary.com

HAPPY FRIDAY & HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND FROM THE GOLIGHTLY GIRLS!

He's officially on the market again, girls. I mean, not any market that I've ever shopped at, but if someone could provide directions and a Clooney-sized shopping cart...

Photo: extratv

He's smart, socially-conscious, funny and very easy on the eyes. And we totally love that he can deliver the smoldering stare above, and then also do hovering plies on the lake. We love a guy who doesn't take himself too seriously.

Photo: Solarnavigator.net

HAPPY FRIDAY & HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND FROM THE GOLIGHTLY GIRLS!

Everyone's favorite cougar-bait, Ashton Kutcher, is our man this Friday. (Demi, you are my hero). Ashton's movie "What Happens In Vegas", opens this weekend.

Photo: images.condenastinteractive.co.uk

We absolutely recommend Vegas as a girlfriend getaway destination, if for no other reason than the possibility of waking up, accidentally married to this:

Photo: metro.co.uk

Who's feeling some marital bliss right now?

HAPPY FRIDAY & HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND, FROM THE GOLIGHTLY GIRLS!

We are entering wedding season, and Holiday Golightly is heavily focused on all-things-bachelorette: getaways, parties, gifts, etc. But today we'd really like to focus on the most important Bachelorette: Deanna Pappas.

"The Bachelorette" shows are infinitely more entertaining and funny than "The Bachelor". We like to see a girlfriend dating 25 guys and taking her time to figure out which one she likes the best. Deanna is now down to 6 guys, and we'd like to help her make some decisions.

The six (photos courtesy of ABC - watch the show, Monday nights, check your local listings and all that):

Graham

Graham's body is POW, and he is an undeniably sexy dude. He is very easy-going, but has total commitment issues, and was a little manipulative in the last episode. He keeps talking about how it bothers him that she's dating other guys. This is not a new show. He knew what he was getting into. Smokin' bod + gun-shy + manipulative = Back away from the sexiness. Slowly.

Jason

Adorable, doting single dad. Also with hot body. Kind of shy, seems like a good listener. What's not to like? We haven't figured that out yet, so play on, Jason.

Jeremy

It is my unofficial opinion that Deanna has already decided that Jeremy is IT, and that she'll just go along with the rest of the show to fulfill the contract. Again, totally unofficial opinion.

Jesse

Fun-loving, sweet, professional snowboarder. I don't see any chemistry between them, but he wears a lot of quirky outfits, and seems fun to have around the house.

Sean

Sean is cute, but also pretty intense. He's a martial arts expert from Kentucky, and seems like he's grasping at commonalities with Deanna to stay in the game. He just about wet himself when he found out she had lived in Kentucky: "SEE? man, I knew we had a lot in common!" Erm, yes, you and 3 million other people.

Twilley

No idea why he's still here. Deanna treats Twilley the way you would treat a kid you were babysitting. I'm waiting for them to have a one-on-one date, where she brings him a sack lunch with a juicebox.

Okay, so we know the filming has already ended, so Deanna will be unable to take any of our sage advice.

Advice? What advice?

Exactly. We are confident that Deanna has made the best decision for her, and we wish her the best. Deanna, please give us a call to plan your bachelorette getaway, and give Jeremy our best!